Kids Need Hobbies

Gardening trivia moment--we live in the mountains, and you kind of HAVE to wait until after Mother's Day to get plants in the ground...but then if you wait any longer, the growing season is so short you can't get anything! Naturally, this year, I was running behind. I got most things planted in the end of May, but I'm still putting in-ground some of my greenhouse babies...So I have been pounding dirt, so to  speak.

Which brings me to my thoughts for today!

Do you have a hobby? I didn't realize how few people seem to have hobbies anymore, until someone pointed it out to me. When you have down time, what do you do to recharge? 

If you're like the vast majority of Americans, the place you turn to your phone, tablet, or some other screen. 

Now, I love movies (and I think we can certainly benefit from good stories told well in the medium of film) and I know there are useful and valid apps and games--I'm not against electronics in their place, but I would argue that we need to cultivate in ourselves and in our children hobbies that are in the real world. Hobbies that, in short, provided some kind of interaction and develop skills that are beneficial, even if the only use is the joy of fulfillment it brings.

During the lockdowns, I think I would have gone crazy if I'd had to see one more news report about toilet paper or pandemic origin theories or safety guidelines. Instead, I turned to some hobbies that had long lay dormant (since having kids) and I worked on those. 

I obsessed over our local birds, took pictures, watched with binoculars, learned calls, and developed a welcoming habitat for them. (And we gave pet names to our favorites.)

I researched and grew my garden from seed, starting my seedlings in my greenhouse (and the kids learned a lot of botany).

I turned my casual "plunking" on the piano into worship time with my family, since churches were shut down, and even when they opened, they wouldn't sing or allow singing because of 'rona concerns. (My kids learned a lot of my favorite hymns and old gospel songs.)

I sketched, drew, and painted; and we drove to beautiful and isolated locations to draw on site (and my kids learned some basics of art and layout, as well as how to pack up and create something en situ.) 

I measured and surveyed and drew maps of planning ideas for redesigning our property and landscape (and my kids learned mapping, drawing-to-scale, and worldbuilding). 

I gave myself reading goals, and cranked through some long-procrastinated reading lists (and my kids really started reading FOR FUN and getting through reading lists of their own!) 

I returned to some language study, and began to build up my vocabulary in a few languages (and my kids were introduced to the fascinating world of linguistics).

I started running for the first time since high school (and my kids enjoyed the benefits of a mom who was not always lethargic and grumpy!) 

And those are just a few of the things I, myself, pursued in those months. As a family, we did many more things--we went up in the mountains and chopped our own firewood; we played football, we birdwatched, we dug into WWII history, we taught the kids how to shoot rifles, we got an archery set and played around with that, we learned how to repair a grandfather clock, we encouraged the kids to start writing their own creative stories and comic books, we dabbled in roadside geology and archeology, we sang, we researched and got choosy with our coffee-drinking, we went stargazing, we took pictures...and so much more! It was a full and fun year, even without all the usual commitments and norms with which we had been accustomed to fill our time.

If we had been depended on media and entertainment to fill our time, I think I would've gone stark, raving insane. Not to mention, my kids would've missed out on all the enrichment (and education!) of each of those hobbies! And now, this year, we're trying even MORE new things because of the success (or lack thereof!) from last year's projects and hobbies. We have also learned how to work as a family (and how NOT to work) for success in anything, which has been so good as we've stepped into a season of new challenges. 

Our culture has a problem with specialization and professionals. Unless you're professional, you aren't supposed to do something (and you certainly never have a platform or opportunity to do it--unless, of course, a professional decides to host an "event" when you are tutored in their specialty). I would argue that we don't all need to be awesome singers to enjoy singing. We can simply like to sing, and we can have sing-a-longs with friends and family, and learn to sing in rounds and harmony and just have a good enough voice to sing lullabies to babies or to sing showtunes when we're happy--and that's not only ok, that's a good thing! I don't have to be a master gardener to enjoy digging around and, eventually, enjoying the fruit of my labor. I can take my little rock-identifying book (or app) and learn all kinds of local geology--and the same with other such interests like astronomy, or any naturalist pursuits! (Not to mention, you become an expert by starting out as a novice!)

My point is, give your kids the gift of seeing you engaging in a hobby, and whenever possible, draw your kids along in that hobby. A tragic missed opportunity, in my opinion, is when I see a parent engaging in a skill or hobby but always being too busy or to crunched for time to slow down and teach the kids "how to do it" too. And I would suggest a little reframing of your mindset when it comes to chores--those can also be hobbies! Changing the oil may just be another checklist item in your weekend, but car mechanics can also be a hobby and your kid might just grow up to enjoy it!

My dad wasn't a great mechanic, but when we couldn't afford to get the car worked on (when I was young), my dad did most of the routine maintenance himself--and he was so gracious and kind to always go slowly enough to teach my sister and me how to do it too--so I learned from probably around age eight how to change the oil and put in a new oil filter and why you need oil in a car anyway; how to change a tire; how to replace a fan belt. Fast forward to college when my friends and I were broke and we couldn't afford a mechanic! I remember one particular incident where I installed a new ignition switch for a friend--because my dad had taken the time to make what probably wasn't his favorite chore into a hobby and he slowed down enough to let me actually help. Then, when it was my turn, I (not a tomboy or an especially mechanically inclined girl) was able to do what none of the GUYS around me could (partly because of my little hands that could get into the steering column cavity to install the part--ha!) 

Hobbies, y'all. 

Dabbling in hobbies is a massive confidence builder--I don't have to be professional to try something, and I can enjoy and thrive in a process through the learning curve. (My mom says my motto is, "DIY til I die.") And I rarely walk into a situation (unless it's organized sports!) where I feel completely incapable of engaging and learning/helping/enjoying some part or aspect. I hope to give my kids the same freedom to try and enjoy things. 

I expect that the breadth and width of my interests is wider than average, because I've always been "an inch deep and a mile wide" kind of person. But whatever you're into, do it, develop it, and teach it to your kids! Radio operating? Go for it! Woodworking? Absolutely! Writing poetry? Why not?! Baking? Yes, please! How beneficial and useful for those things to become something your kids see as a joy and pleasure, rather than just...work. And it may not strike the same chord with them as it does with you, but seriously--

Give your kids the gift of hobbies!